Relationships are natural, but that does not mean that they don’t require regular maintenance. In order to develop a strong, trusting, and healthy parental bond with your teen, try one of these activities.
- Let Your Teen Teach You – Do you have a teen that is great with computers? A musical instrument? Video games? Strengthen that parental bond by letting your teen teach you something about a topic that is important to them. Actively listen to what is being said, and pay attention to the things that excite your teen. You have an opportunity here to not only bond with your teen, but also show your teen what a good student looks like.
- Plan a Shared Experience – Give your teen something positive to look forward to while you strengthen your parental bond! It doesn’t have to be a trip around the world, but it should be something that you can both look forward to doing together. Use a calendar to mark the occasion, and do some research together on where you are going, or the activity you are planning to do. This can provide bonding time prior to the trip, build excitement, and also memories that they will likely treasure for the rest of their life.
- A Tangible Results Activity – You could compete in a charity walk, start a garden, raise money for charity, collect food for the homeless, or any number of other activities that will end in a clearly tangible manner. So your teen that you can successful start, and finish, a task together. You’ll be able to share in the wonderful results, improve your parental bond, and spend quality time together as a family. Completing small tasks and challenges can boost self-esteem and promote organizational skills too!
They key here is to have fun with each other and value the time you get to spend together strengthening your parental bond and improving your relationship. You teen is going to spend a lot of time out in the world trying to figure out who they are, and where their place is, so get those precious moments in while you can. Have no regrets when it comes to the amount of time you spend with your teen, and hope they remember those little life lessons you taught along the way.
One of the first questions I ask parents who come to me with teens who are experiencing behavioral issues is, “Are you using consequences or punishments?” You would be surprised at the number of parents that have never really thought about the difference between the two. (more…)
By now most of us parents know that there is no real manual for parenting, especially when it comes to teens. However, I have found that these 10 Universal Tips for Raising Great Teens can help in almost any parenting situation. (more…)
I tried to compile a list of text slang and acronyms that are commonly used, but the truth is that the Internet is ever evolving and just when we think we know one set of slang terms a new social media site helps create 20 new terms. So, here’s a list of what I could pull together. Some of it’s pretty relevant, and some of it might be a little dated. However, it pays to know what’s being said. Some of the more sexual things here are pretty shocking to me. It’s amazing that they are so causal that there exists slang for it. Read On SFW (mostly).
IWSN – I want sex now
GNOC – Get naked on camera
NIFOC – Naked in front of computer
PIR – Parent in room
CU46 – See you for sex
53X – Sex
9 – Parent watching
99 – Parent gone
1174′ – Party meeting place
THOT – That hoe over there
CID – Acid (the drug)
Broken – Hungover from alcohol
420 – Marijuana
POS – Parent over shoulder
SUGARPIC – Suggestive or erotic photo
KOTL – Kiss on the lips
(L)MIRL – Let’s meet in real life
PRON – Porn
TDTM – Talk dirty to me
8 – Oral sex
CD9 – Parents around/Code 9
IPN – I’m posting naked
LH6 – Let’s have sex
WTTP – Want to trade pictures?
DOC – Drug of choice
TWD – Texting while driving
GYPO – Get your pants off
KPC- Keeping parents clueless
?^ Want to Hook Up?
ASLP (What is your) Age/Sex/Location/Picture? (Also ASL)
CU46 See You For Sex
DYHAB/G Do You Have A Boyfriend/Girlfriend?
DTH Down To Hang (I’m up for getting together)
FWB Friends With Benefits
GNOC Get Naked on Camera
I&I Intercourse & Inebriation
IPN I’m Posting Naked
LH6 Let’s Have Sex
LJBF Let’s just be friends
LMIRL Let’s Meet In Real Life
LYLAB/S Love You Like A Brother/Sister
NSA No Strings Attached
RU/18 Are You Over 18?
WTTP Want To Trade Pictures?
#-) Exhausted, partied all night
DTF Down to F*ck
DTA Down to Anal
GNRN Get Naked Right Now
FMH F*uck Me Harder
IWS I Want Sex
IIT Is It Tight
Q2C Quick to Come
RUH Are You Horny?
TDTM Talk Dirty To Me
S2R Send To Receive (Pics or Video)
Over the course of a lifetime humans develop in many ways. From infancy to adulthood human beings will go through different developmental stages. Social development is very important, and plays a large role in how students develop their own self-perception. This of course will change with age and experience, but the stages of social development will inevitably evolve based on physical, social, and even academic aspects of their lives. Let’s discuss the stages of social development and the role in which they play in how educators teach in the classroom, as well as how teachers can present a positive sense of self, and what the educator’s role is in moral and prosocial development in the classroom.
Whether we are talking about Erickson’s stages of development, or even a broader sense of the stages in which we develop as humans, it’s important to recognize the stages involved. We all begin life in infancy. This stage is where trust and mistrust starts to be established. As infants rely on their caregivers to provide for their basic needs they develop a basic outlook on the world, it’s either a place of comfort and reliability, or unpredictability and danger (Ormrod, 2000). Post infancy, the next stage is early childhood, a time when children learn to begin satisfying some of their own basic needs. During this time children will learn to flourish in their own abilities, or begin to doubt what they can accomplish by themselves. This happens primarily due to the amount of encouragement and support a child receives from their parents and caregivers. During this phase children will develop their own interests and intentions, seeking out ways to pursue independent activities (Ormrod, 2000). As children advance to the stage of childhood, they begin to see themselves as students. During this stage students begin to seem their sense of self-worth directly related to the amount of achievement and recognition that they receive from peers, parents, and educators. Recognition encourages students at this stage to work harder, and seek out acceptance and recognition for a job well done. Adolescence can be a trying stage for children. They are beginning the long transition towards adulthood and truly trying to establish a sense of identity. This stage is an adventurous stage that involves students reaching out into the world in order to develop an understanding of exactly who they are, and where their place will be in the world. In this stage it’s not uncommon for students to experiment with different ideologies, behaviors, and activities. Towards the end of this stage, students can start to develop a sense of self-sacrifice and compromise, and learn the value of putting the needs of others before their own. This of course leads into adulthood. During adulthood students learn to make more long-term commitments, establish potentially long-lasting relationships, and truly start to make a place for themselves in the world. As you can see, each of these stages are quite different, yet may overlap at times, especially in the social and educational settings of school.
For educators, social development is going to play a major role in the way that they teach, and the way that they communicate effectively with students. Depending on where students are in the various stages of social development will determine how students learn the most effectively, what obstacles may present themselves, and how to best encourage and recognize student success in the classroom. During early education it’s important for educators to identify any difficulties in social-emotional areas, due to the fact identification and intervention can be most effective during the early stages of these difficulties (Aubrey, & Ward, 2013). Teachers can play a major role in promoting a positive sense of self in the classroom. Promoting diversity among students, avoiding gender stereotyping, and allowing students to try on different roles within the classroom, will help students find areas in which they are successful, and generally help promote a greater sense of self. Teachers should be encouraged to promote a positive verbal environment because it can help student’s foster positive feelings and beliefs about themselves and their accomplishments. This interactions between adults and children can increase the sense of value a student has when it comes to their contributions in the classroom (Meece, & Soderman, 2010).
Teachers play a major role in the development of moral and pro-social behavior. In my experience, teachers are the first adults, outside of the home, who have the unique ability to demonstrate what appropriate behavior looks like, and the way other should be treated. As students grow from children to adolescents, they become ever so dependent on social relationships within their peer groups, and learning pro-social behaviors can have a very positive effect on the way adolescence develop relationships (Hartup, 1996). Having firsthand experienced teachers who went out of their way to correct moral transgressions, and promote prosocial behavior, I have been able to reflect on what I have learned, and how it has defined me as a person. My own teachers have demonstrated positive interactions that benefit others, and those actions have help sculpt the way I stated treating others. Teachers who made it a point to speak to me in a way that was courteous, respectful, and without interruption, have taught me the benefit of a positive verbal environment, and how it can create positive interactions among students and educators, and leave everyone feeling respected. These educators never made judgmental comments about students, or other teachers or peers, allowing students to develop a more positive perception of everyone involved (Meece, & Soderman, 2010). Teachers, in my opinion, calibrate a student’s original “moral compass” and define where “True North” is when it comes to morality.
In conclusion, it is of the utmost importance to understand the stages of social development and the role in which they play in the classroom. The way lessons are taught, the way information is received, and the way students will connect with educators, all depend on where a student is at in these various stages of development. Teachers, and all educators, can present a positive sense of self, and demonstrate behaviors that promote moral and prosocial development in the classroom and beyond.
Aubrey, C., & Ward, K. (2013). Early years practitioners’ views on early personal, social and emotional development. Emotional & Behavioural Difficulties, 18(4), 435-447. doi:10.1080/13632752.2013.807541
Hartup, W. W. (1996). The company they keep: Friendships and their developmental significance. Child Development, 67(1), 1–13.
Meece, D., & Soderman, A. K. (2010). Positive Verbal Environments: Setting the Stage for Young Children’s Social Development. Young Children, 65(5), 81-86.
Ormrod, J. (2000). Personal and Social Development. In Educational psychology: Developing learners (8th ed., pp. 62-64). Upper Saddle River, New Jersey: Merrill.
Here is a Cyber Bullying infographic from Cyber Smart.
Cybersmart put up this really great infographic with some great tips for dealing with cyber bullying.
Most of you know that I’m a huge anti-bullying supporter, and cyber bullying is a serious matter that should be dealt with quickly and efficiently.
Cyber bullying can take many forms:
- Sending mean messages or threats to a person’s email account or cell phone
- Spreading rumors online or through texts
- Posting hurtful or threatening messages on social networking sites or web pages
- Stealing a person’s account information to break into their account and send damaging messages
- Pretending to be someone else online to hurt another person
- Taking unflattering pictures of a person and spreading them through cell phones or the Internet
- Sexting, or circulating sexually suggestive pictures or messages about a person
What is Sexual bullying?
Sexual Bullying is behavior that occurs when an individual, or a group of peers, harass a teen using actions that are sexual in nature. Sexual bullying can occur online, via electronic devices, or in person.
I’m not going to lie, teaching personal responsibility is hard. It’s going to force parents and teens alike to look inward and do some serious self-evaluation. It does not really matter if your kid is naturally more compliant, or a human tornado, teaching personal responsibility takes a little bit of work. (more…)
If your teen has been struggling with rehab, or drug abuse, you know all too well that things can go from good to bad pretty quickly. In this post I’m going to provide some rehab and recovery tips for supporting teens in crisis. (more…)